A Cure
by miraleeann
Summary: By request. A young Remus Lupin "tries" to cure his condition. Part of the New Beginnings world.


**By Request.**

* * *

He sat in his bedroom cradling his father's wand in his hands.

He knew it was wrong.

He knew that he wasn't supposed to touch his parent's wands or anyone's wand at all for that matter.

He didn't care though. As far as he was concerned he didn't have another option.

He was tired of his 'condition.' He had spent the better part of the past two months reading every advanced magic book that he could manage to get his hands on. His parents were convinced that he was just prepping for his first year at school. They were convinced that he would be the smartest in his year.

He had made the decision in June right after the full moon. He couldn't go to Hogwarts like this. He just couldn't.

He knew that the staff was already aware of his affliction. Appropriate measures were being taken and the other students were to think that he went home once a month for a special academic program.

He knew he should be thankful that the school was being so accommodating. But he knew that he wouldn't ever make any real friends the way that he was. Who would want to be friends with someone like him? And he couldn't hide it forever. Eventually a real friend would find out. It was the reason he didn't have any close friends after all.

There was the muggle boy that lived down the street. He played with him occasionally but obviously he had to go to great lengths to make sure he never found out. Then there was Peter Pettigrew - he lived on the opposite side of town. He was also a wizard and although that certainly made things easier, he still knew nothing about the effects of the full moon on Remus.

It was his secret- a secret he hated keeping.

After endless nights of searching through thick textbooks he had finally found a spell that might be able to cure him. It was advanced magic and he was nervous that he wouldn't be able to do it. He didn't feel like he had a choice though. He had to try.

His hands were shaking as he opened the spell book next to him.

He flipped to the correct page and carefully read the spell over once more. It seemed simple enough, he just had to point the wand at himself and say the correct words. Still, he had a feeling that it couldn't be that easy.

He could hear his parents talking and laughing below him in the kitchen. He knew that they would be calling him down for tea soon. If he was going to do this he needed to do it quickly.

Slowly he pointed the wand at his face. He leaned over in order to see the words more clearly and then recited them verbatim.

The wand shot a bright light out of its tip and hit him directly in the side of his head. He felt a sharp pain for a second and then nothing.

Quickly he scrambled to his feet and looked into his mirror. He knew that if it had worked he wouldn't physically look any different but he wanted to make sure that the magic hadn't left any marks on his face.

He let out a sigh of relief as he saw that his face appeared to be perfectly normal. It wasn't until he turned his head that he saw that his left ear was completely missing.

He gasped loudly as his fingers ran across the empty skin where his ear once was.

The tears instantly welded up in his eyes.

He glanced back down at the spell book and the wand he had nicked from his parent's room.

He couldn't hide this from them. He had planned on going down to the kitchen a hero telling them how he had cured himself and now he was going to go down and tell them how he had broken the rules.

He never got in trouble. Being an only child and having hardly any friends didn't give him a lot of opportunities to get into mischief. He was sure he would be in trouble tonight though- big trouble.

He left the wand and book on his bedroom floor as he slowly made his way out of his room.

"Remus tea," his mother called before he even made it to the top of the staircase.

He didn't answer her.

He slowly made his way down the stairs. His hand kept going to where his ear once was. He couldn't have stopped touching it if he tried.

He lingered outside of the kitchen entrance trying to figure out what he was going to say. He couldn't come up with any better or easy way to tell them what had happened though.

"I was beginning to think you hadn't heard me," his mother stated as he walked into the room. "I made your favorite biscuits today."

"I have to tell you both something," Remus said. "Show you something too I guess."

"What is it?" His father asked as the paper that had been concealing his face dropped.

Remus didn't have to answer him though the moment his father looked at him he saw it.

"What in Merlin's name…"

"I was trying to do a spell to fix my condition," Remus confessed as the tears that had been threatening to fall finally spilled down his face. "I took your wand but the spell didn't work, it just made my ear disappear."

His mother was comforting him now, hugging him gently.

"You took my wand?" His father asked in a dumbfounded voice.

He was shocked by his son's actions. Remus never did something so disobedient; he never straight out broke rules.

"I'm sorry, I really am dad. I thought I could cure myself."

"Darling if there was a cure, don't you think we would have already done it?" His mother asked gently.

Remus nodded. "I thought maybe you didn't know about it."

"Listen to me Love," his mother said softly. "If there were any way in the world to cure you it would be done. However that is sadly not the case and you must promise me that you will never try to cure yourself by doing magic on yourself again."

He nodded into his mother's side. "I promise."

"I am going to have to make a potion to grow your ear back. Hopefully it'll be fully grown before you go to school next week."

"I'm sorry," he said once more. He hated to think of his mother making a potion while she worried about him and his ear.

She leaned down and kissed the top of his head before gently releasing him from her grip. "I'm going to go see if I have everything I need. Hopefully you can start taking it tonight."

She hurried out of the room and into the pantry leaving Remus and his father alone.

"I think we best discuss your taking my wand."

"I am sorry," Remus replied. "It was a stupid thing to do."

"Very," his father nodded. His son had stopped crying but he could see that it wouldn't take much for him to start once more. "However perhaps losing your ear is punishment enough and if it isn't, I'm sure that being made to stay in bed and grow it back for the remainder of your summer holiday will be."

"I'll never do it again," Remus promised. He was beyond thankful that his father wasn't going to punish him for his actions.

"See to it that you don't," his father replied. "Also see to it that you realize that your worth is not determined by your condition. I know that you are nervous about being at Hogwarts and making friends given the circumstances but I have faith that everything will work out more than fine."

Remus smiled softly as his mother walked back into the room with a dozen vials in her arms.

"Thanks dad."


End file.
